Saturday, November 29, 2008

Shivraj Patil & His Bandhgalas Scare Away The Terrorists

Before I could reach there, the terrorists who had attacked one of the hospitals, the Cama Hospital, had left and those who attacked the railway station had also left.


Source: http://www.expressindia.com/latest-news/Terrorists-had-left-before-I-reached-terror-sites--Patil/391406/

Oh, Where Are You?

Where are you Mr.Raj Thackre the superhero of the Marathi manoos? Are you safely enconced in your fortified castle with a 100 NSG jawans protecting you? Or have you fled the city to save your life? Shouldn't you be showing your face as it is your city that is under siege? I think you are hiding because the commandos who are involved in the rescue operations are mostly from outside Maharashtra...If you don't want outsiders to be in Mumbai, why did you let these NSG and MARCOS commandos come into your Marathi city and help? Why didn't you stop Major Sandeep Unnikrishnan, a Bangalorean with the Bihar Regiment, from giving up his life?

Friday, November 28, 2008

Conspiracy Theories

Who are these these terrorists who have caused such havoc in Mumbai? Don't know but there are many conspiracy theories doing the rounds and one of them blames the Mossad-RSS-VHP combine...

Our worst fears have come true. It is clear that Mossad is involved in the whole affair. An entire city has been attacked by Mossad and probably units of mercenaries. It is not possible for one single organization to plan and execute such a sophisticated operation. It is clear that this operation was backed by communal forces from within the Indian State. The Home Minister Shivraj Patil should resign. The RSS-BJP-VHP-Bajrang Dal should be banned. Advani and others ought to be arrested. Today is a day of shame for all Indians and all Hindus. Muslims and secular Hindus have been proven right. RSS type forces and Israel are all involved in not only destabilizing but finishing India. India should immediately snap all relations with Israel. We owe this much to Karkare and the brave ATS men who had shown the courage to arrest Praggya Singh, Raj Kumar Purohit, the army officer and several others.


Please read the whole article as it is quite interesting...Infact, it made me laugh...If the Mossad had been involved, half the population of Mumbai would be dead...

Terrorism in India

"Mumbai is a world class city," shouted politicians...What world class city? Terrorists came in by sea, conducted 10 coordinated strikes and what do the politicians say, "Condolences." This strike demonstrates the inefficiency of the government...Our brave BUT unequipped cops with tiny 1947 era revolvers & rifles were forced to combat assailants with AK47s and satellite phones!!!! Our government cannot even handle rescue operations during the floods let alone diffuse bombs, negotiate and attack gunmen with sophisticated weapons...This government is invisible and non-existent...This government is sleeping!!!! We need a peoples's revolution!!!

Thursday, November 27, 2008

Maximum City Attacked

It has happened again...Mumbai has been attacked and the police and various intelligence agencies were caught napping...What were they doing? They were doing what they are supposed to do - providing politicians with security cover...The only solution to the terrorist problem is doing away with the security cover of VVVIPs,VVIPs and VIPs and other so called important people...Only when the people in power realize what it is like living in the real world will anything concrete be done...

Wednesday, November 26, 2008

Irritating Phrases Spoken By Indians

This is a follow up to the 'Top 10 most irritating English phrases' post...There are some phrases spoken by Indians which irritate me a lot...They are:

- Timepass

- Fuchcha (used in Delhi University...Refers to a college fresher)

- Fundu (Again, used in Delhi in lieu of fundamental)

- K.Nags (Kamala Nagar), Def. Col (Defence Colony)- I hate the Indian penchant for shortening names

- Arre yaar

- Do the needful

- Tight slap (does a tight slap hurt more than a regular one?)

- Isn't it? (e.g. "You must be hungry, isn't it?)

- Will try my level best

- Don't be pricey

- Prepone

- Mention not

- The current has gone (instead of "the power has gone")

- The use of the word "boy" instead of "man" (e.g. cricketers are called boys..."The boys played well today")

- Convented

- I will make a move now

Shakespearan Take On Singur

This e-mail was forwarded to me...

Buddho Antony mounts the steps of bloodied capital, showing 'red eyes' not from threats, but from genuine weeping. He begins:
'Friends, NRIs, countrymen. Don't lend me your investments.
I come to bury Nano, not to praise it.
The evil that men do lives after them;
The good is oft interred with their machinery;
So let it be with the Tatas. The noble Mamata
Hath told you that i, Buddho was too ambitious:
If it were so, it was a grievous fault,
And grievously hath i and Bengal answer'd it.
Here, under leave of Mamata, Governor Gandhi, and the rest...
Come i to speak at Nano's funeral.
Roton was my friend, faithful and just to our state,
But Mamata says we were too ambitious;
And Mamata is an honourable woe-man.
I had brought many venture capitalists back to Kolkata,
Whose investments did the coffers fill...
I speak not to reverse what Mamata screwed,
But here i am to speak what i do know.
You all did love this Tata once, not without cause:
What cause withholds you then, to mourn for Nano?
O development, thou art fled to brutish protestors,
And the state has lost its jobs and capital. Bear with me;
My heart is in the debris there with Nano,
And i must pause till it come back to me...
But yesterday the Nano might
Have rolled out before Durga Pujo. Now lies it abandoned.
O cadres, if i were disposed to stir
Your hearts and minds to rational rage,
I should do Trinamool wrong, and my own CPM diehards wrong,
Who, you all know, are honourable woe-men and men:

If you had hopes, prepare to shed them now. You all do know this MOU. I remember The first time ever Salem Group signed it.
Through this the well-beloved Mamata stabb'd;
And as she pluck'd our Tata Motors away,
Mark how the blood of Bengal follow'd it,
As rushing out of doors, to be resolved
If Mamata so unkindly knock'd, or no;
For Mamata, as you know, is the people's angel:
This was the unkindest cut of all;
For when the noble Tata saw her stab,
Ingratitude, more strong than traitors' arms,
Quite angered him. Then burst forth his mighty Plan B, and, in his mantle gathering up his machinery,
Great Roton withdrew.
O, what a fall was there, my West Bengal.
Then I, and you, and Harsh Neotia's malls fell down,
Whilst bloody backwardness swept over us again.'

Tuesday, November 25, 2008

The Top Ten Most Irritating Phrases

Oxford University has compiled a list of top ten most irritating phrases:

1 - At the end of the day

2 - Fairly unique

3 - I personally

4 - At this moment in time

5 - With all due respect

6 - Absolutely

7 - It's a nightmare

8 - Shouldn't of

9 - 24/7

10 - It's not rocket science

I would like to add some more:

11 - It is what it is

12 - Actually

13 - 110 percent

14 - Basically (Indians love to use this)

15 - No Brainer (Americans love this phrase)

16 - Having said that

15 - Ditto same (Another Indian favourite)

16 - I need my space

17 - Internet acronyms like LOL and OMG

18 - Awesome (Young urbans Indians have picked this up from American movies and sitcoms)

19 - Impacted

20 - To be honest with you

Monday, November 24, 2008

I Am Depressed

I was horrified to read that Barack Obama had offered the post of Secretary of State (SoS) to Hillary Clinton and was positively depressed when she accepted it…I thought Obama was the poster boy for change – wasn’t change (and his extremely well run campaign) the reason for his victory? With Hillary as the SoS, there will be no change…Let’s face it, she is a huge part of the establishment…Obama wanted to bring in a new administration which was radically different from the Bush-Clinton-Clinton-Bush-Bush era but now I don’t see that happening…He has ‘allowed’ Hillary to choose her own staff – do you think she’ll choose anybody new? I think not…Then there is Bill…He will obviously be a ‘shadow’ advisor…Also, his dealings with some people regarding donations for his foundation in recent years has been questionable…I’m sure these will be scrutinized with a telescope before Hillary is confirmed…

Obama was and is against the war in Iraq and wants to change the policy towards Afghanistan and Pakistan…Hillary, if you remember, voted for the war in Iraq and later when she realized it was wrong, refused to apologize for her flawed judgement...That shows an ego bigger than the universe…I can already visualize great problems between her and him...

I agree that there are positives in choosing Hillary (she has visited 82 or so countries, knows many heads of state etc.) but the negatives far outweigh them and I think the entire exercise is one of appeasement and I hope Obama’s selection of the rest of his cabinet is based on merit alone…

Saturday, November 22, 2008

US Bailout





(I don't own these images...They were forwarded to me by e-mail)

Sore Losers

The Aussies have always been sore losers and they especially hate losing to a 'third world' (read non-white) country like India...On the one hand Matthew Hayden says,"We've had trouble with our over rates for a long time now" and on the other he blames his team's loss to India in the just concluded test series on the Indian batman and the fact that India is a third world country..."Often we find ourselves with hands on hips waiting for someone to either face up or someone in the sightboard to move away; all the little frustrations that happen in Third World countries and the heat as well."

Grow up you Aussies!!! Me thinks Matthew Hayden has a book coming out...

Friday, November 21, 2008

Breaking News




Thanks: The Huffington Post

Thursday, November 20, 2008

The Most Idiotic Ads





Oof!!!They are giving me a brain ache!!!

(I don't own any of these images...I got them off the net...If you have a comment, please feel free to write to me)

Tuesday, November 18, 2008

Hell Explained By A Chemistry Student

The following was forwarded to me by e-mail...I found it very interesting and entertaining...I hope you do too...

The following is an actual question given on a University of Washington chemistry mid term. The answer by one student was so "profound" that the professor shared it with colleagues, via the Internet, which is, of course, why we now have the pleasure of enjoying it as well :

Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs heat)?

Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law (gas cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed) or some variant.
One student, however, wrote the following:
First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we need to know the rate at which souls are moving into Hell and the rate at which they are leaving. I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving. As for how many souls are entering Hell, let's look at the different religions that exist in the world today.
Most of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell. Since there is more than one of these religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all souls go to Hell. With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell because Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand proportionately as souls are added.
This gives two possibilities:
1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell breaks loose.
2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in Hell,then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over.
So which is it?
If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my Freshman year that, "It will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you," and take into account the fact that I slept with her last night, then number two must be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and has already frozen over. The corollary of this theory is that since Hell has frozen over, it follows that it is not accepting any more souls and is therefore, extinct......leaving only Heaven, thereby proving the existence of a divine being which explains why, last night, Teresa kept shouting "Oh my God."


THIS STUDENT RECEIVED AN A+.

Delhi Elections

Q: Why should I vote for the Congress?

A: Because the choice is clear...Their campaign line is: "Vote for us as we are the only ones who can take you to a major global event - the Commonwealth Games!!! These games are the solution to all our problems...So, if you want lower prices, water, electricity, better roads and cleaner air, you have no choice but us."

Sunday, November 16, 2008

Funny Signs & Pictures








(FYI:These photographs are from e-mails that were forwarded to me...None were taken by me...)

Monday, November 10, 2008

George Washington Out, Martin Luther King In



This new one dollar bill will be introduced on January 20, 2009

Sunday, November 9, 2008

You Can't Change An IT Pro

Setting: Kitchen table Edison, NJ...A conversation between an IT pro/coder from Small Town, T.N., India who managed to cross the 7 seas in 1999 by doing a course in C++ from Aptech, Small Town, T.N., India and his wife also from Small Town, T.N., India but with a fondness for the good things in life...

Wife: Ooof!!! I'm sick of making dosas, sambar and idlis every day... We never eat out or go out for movies or anything...We never have fun...My life is all about shopping for groceries, cooking, and cleaning...I never get a break...And then there is the 20 year old Chevy that you've bought me...Do you know how difficult it is to load it with sacks of rice and dal from Orchard Road and drive it back to our house? The car just doesn't move...I don't know why I married you...

IT pro (looking up from the latest edition of Tanilians Abroad): What are you complaining about? Don't I earn enough money to house,clothe and feed you? After all, I brought you here, to the land of milk and honey...You should be grateful to me for that...If I hadn't married you, you would still have been in that godforsaken town...And just think of the money we save by buying food in bulk...

Wife: But we never enjoy the money...You get your kicks by just looking at your monthly bank statement...What's the use of earning money if you don't enjoy it?

IT pro : Woman, listen to me...Life is not about having fun - it is about making ends meet and saving money...
(Then softening a bit)
I have an idea...Why don't we go have lunch at the $5.99 all-you-can-eat South Indian buffet down the road?

The wife is not very happy about eating idlis and dosas in a restaurant but agrees to the suggestion as it would mean going out

At Malabar Restaurant, Edison, NJ

Waiter: Sir, what would you like - a-la-carte or buffet?

IT pro: Buffet, please...But since my wife has a stomach virus she won't be eating so charge me only for one buffet...

Wife (angry): What do you mean by I'm not well? I'm perfectly fine and famished!!!

IT pro: Listen, it's an all-you-can-eat buffet so I'll get food on my plate for the both of us...Why should we pay for two when we can both eat by paying for one?

Friday, November 7, 2008

How to Write a Successful Book

Setting: 2 friends sitting at a dinner table…One of them is a 40-ish struggling writer…

Writer: I think I’m going to give up writing…I just can’t manage to find a publisher for my book...I've given 5 years of my life to it…I think it’s time to give up…

Friend: WOAH!!! Don’t do that…Your book is good…It's different...You just need to market it well…Let me see (thinks for a few minutes)…
EUREKA!!! I’ve got it!!! You need to get your book on the Oprah Book Club list…I’ve read some of the books she has recommended and I think I know the formula…You have to first write another book…It should be like the TV movies that come on Hallmark and Lifetime channels only seem a bit more intellectual like a Toni Morrison book...The main character should be an emotionally anguished one, preferably a poor black female, who is recovering from physical or sexual abuse or is struggling against racism or poverty…You basically have to make the reader feel good about herself and her life – how she is much better off than the character in your book…

Writer: But I’m not that kind of a writer…

Friend: It doesn’t matter…Once you’ve written this book, I can guarantee that you’ll find a publisher…Then get your publisher to get it on the Book Club list…I’m sure Oprah will choose it because of the theme…Once she recommends your book on her show, you’ll sell millions and become a successful author…After that you’ll get calls from hoards of publishers wanting to publish your next book…That is when you give them the book you’ve already written and have been trying to get published…

Tuesday, November 4, 2008

An Obama Win Could Spell Doom For Journalists

A conversation between an American journalist and his wife

American journalist: I'm worried about tomorrow's election...

Wife: Yeah, I know what you mean...McCain may just pull it off...

American journalist: No, I'm not worried about that...I'm worried that Obama will win...

Wife: What? You've been a life long Democrat...Why don't you want Obama to win?

American journalist: Well, Obama is a straight guy...He's thin, handsome, well educated, intelligent, well read, and has a beautiful and intelligent wife whom he has never been unfaithful to...If he becomes the President, I won't have anything to write about and that means I could lose my job...

Saturday, November 1, 2008

Palinisms



"If [the media] convince enough voters that that is negative campaigning, for me to call Barack Obama out on his associations then I don't know what the future of our country would be in terms of First Amendment rights and our ability to ask questions without fear of attacks by the mainstream media." --Sarah Palin, getting first amendment rights backwards while claiming that criticism of her is unconstitutional, radio interview with WMAL-AM, Oct. 31, 2008

"I don't know if you're going to use the word 'terrorist' there." --Sarah Palin, asked if people who bomb abortion clinics are terrorists, NBC News interview, Oct. 23, 2008

"I'm very, very pleased to be cleared of any legal wrongdoing ... any hint of any kind of unethical activity there. Very pleased to be cleared of any of that." --Sarah Palin, after an Alaska legislative report found she had broken the state's ethics law and abused her power in the Troopergate scandal, conference call with Alaska reporters, Oct. 12, 2008

"They are also building schools for the Afghan children so that there is hope and opportunity in our neighboring country of Afghanistan." --Sarah Palin, speaking at a fundraiser in San Francisco, Oct. 5, 2008

"There's a place in Hell reserved for women who don't support other women." --Sarah Palin, misquoting former Secretary of State Madeline Albright, who said women should "help" other women," Carson, Caliif., Oct. 4, 2008

Katie Couric: "What other Supreme Court decisions do you disagree with?"
Sarah Palin: "Well, let's see. There's --of course --in the great history of America rulings there have been rulings, there's never going to be absolute consensus by every American. And there are -- those issues, again, like Roe v Wade where I believe are best held on a state level and addressed there. So you know -- going through the history of America, there would be others but--"
Couric: "Can you think of any?"
Palin: "Well, I could think of -- of any again, that could be best dealt with on a more local level. Maybe I would take issue with. But you know, as mayor, and then as governor and even as a Vice President, if I'm so privileged to serve, wouldn't be in a position of changing those things but in supporting the law of the land as it reads today." --unable to name any Supreme Court decisions other than Roe v. Wade, CBS News interview, Oct. 1, 2008

"I'll try to find you some and I'll bring them to you." --Sarah Palin, asked by Katie Couric to cite specific examples of how John McCain has pushed for more regulation in his 26 years in the Senate, CBS News interview, Sept. 24, 2008

"Well, it certainly does because our -- our next door neighbors are foreign countries. They're in the state that I am the executive of. And there in Russia ... We have trade missions back and forth. We-- we do-- it's very important when you consider even national security issues with Russia as Putin rears his head and comes into the air space of the United States of America, where-- where do they go? It's Alaska. It's just right over the border. It is-- from Alaska that we send those out to make sure that an eye is being kept on this very powerful nation, Russia, because they are right there. They are right next to-- to our state." --Sarah Palin, asked by Katie Couric how Alaska's proximity to Russia gives her foreign policy experience, CBS News interview, Sept. 24, 2008

"But ultimately what the bailout does is help those who are concerned about the healthcare reform that is needed to help shore up our economy." --Sarah Palin, explaining the $700 billion government bailout of Wall Street to Karie Couric, CBS News interview, Sept. 24, 2008